//(Please listen to this as you read; it doesn’t have the same effect otherwise:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9AN04imFDK8)
YOU’RE JUST SAYING THAT.
Psst. You wanna know who invented Universal Standard Time? Scottish dude. The phone? A different Scottish dude. Not just the TV, but later on… The COLOURED TV? 2 kick-ass Scottish dudes.
(My personal favourite) The first ENGLISH textbook was invented by a Scot.
SHERLOCK HOLMES WAS CREATED BY A SCOTTISH WRITER FUCK YEAH SUCK IT.
You wanna travel somewhere? But still be working out at the same time? No problem man, just take your bike, that was INVENTED BY A SCOTTISH GUY.
You wary of that mosquito cause you know it could carry Malaria? Thank God that Scottish guy figured out they were carriers.
Want some ice-cold milk? If it wasn’t for my country’s men inventing the fridge YOU’D HAVE TO HAVE ROOM TEMPERATURE MILK, UGH.
Want some toast with your milk? What would we do without Scotty Scot McScot making the toaster?
Need to go out in the rain? Better get your SCOTTISH INVENTED WATERPROOFS.
Need to cut the grass. No biggie, a Scot invented you a kick-ass lawnmower.
aw hell YESS. U KNOW DAS RIGHT.